“The fire fades away
Most of everyday
Is full of tired excuses
But it’s to hard to say
I wish it were simple
But we give up easily
You’re close enough to see that
You’re the other side of the world to me”
– “Other Side of the World”
I know life isn’t supposed to be easy. I understand the whole concept of “for there to be compassion, there has to be suffering”; I also get that life’s rewards are more meaningful when they come after effort and difficulty. I recognize, most of all, that we are responsible for our own decisions.
Some days I think that the world is a decent place – that people are basically good, and that it all seems worthwhile. These are the days that I find hope in the unknown, believing that something amazing can and will happen.
Other days, I find are full of tired excuses. Things don’t change, people aren’t what you hope or expect they can be. Life feels worn.
It’s not necessarily that anything has changed – some days just feel better than others. It’s so simple to give up – to believe that you will never have the future you dreamed of, never find the love you deserve, never accomplish all that you hoped to.
Why is it so much easier to put that fire out, than to try to keep it kindling?
“But you are what you love
And not what loves you back
So I guess that’s why you keep calling me back
I’m fraudulent, a thief at best
A coward who paints a bullshit canvas
Things that will never happen to me
But at arms length, it’s Tim who said I’m good at it, I’ve mastered it
Avoiding, avoiding everything”
– “You Are What You Love”